SHAWN ANCHOR: THE HAPPY SECRET TO BETTER WORK

Focus of 5
I. THREE GRATITUDES – scanning the world for the positives
II. JOURNALING – reliving the positive experiences
III. EXERCISE – tells our brain that our behavior matters
IV. MEDITATION – helps us get over the cultural ADHD
V. CONSCIOUS ACTS OF KINDNESS – when praising or thanking some1 in our network.
→ Ripples of Positivity and a Real Revolution.

Quotes
A. “..the more you believe in your own ability to success, the more likely it is that you will.”

B. “Beliefs are so powerful because they dictate our efforts and actions.”

C. “Constantly scanning the world for the negative comes with a great cost. It undercuts are creativity, raises our stress levels, and lowers our motivation and ability to accomplish goals.”

D. “Optimism, it turns out, is a tremendously powerful predictor of work performance.”

E. “The key is not to completely shut out all of the bad, all of the time, but to have a reasonable, realistic, healthy sense of optimism.”

F. “The best leaders are the ones who show their true colors not during the banner years, but during times of struggle.”

G. “One of the biggest drivers of success is the belief that our behavior matters; that we have control over our future.”

H. “Knowledge is only part of the battle. Without action, knowledge is often meaningless.”
I. “Habits are like financial capital – forming one today is an investment that will automatically give out returns for years to come.”

J. “When we encounter an unexpected challenge of threat, the only way to save ourselves is to hold on tight to the people around us and not let go.”

K. “The most successful people I’ve worked with know that even in an extraordinarily competitive environment, we are more equipped to handle challenges and obstacles when we pool the resources of those around us and capitalize on even the smallest moments we spend interacting with each other.”

L. “Studies show that the more team members are encouraged to socialize and interact face-to-face, the more engaged they feel, the more energy they have, and the longer they can stay focused on a task.”

M. “The people who actively invest in their relationships are the heart and should of a thriving organization, the force that drives their teams forward.”

N. “Studies have found that the strength of the bond between manager and employee is the prime predictor of both daily productivity and the length of time people stay at their jobs.”

O. “The best leaders give their employees the space and time to let moments of social connection develop on their own.”

P. “Smiling tricks your brain into thinking you’re happy, so it starts producing the neurochemicals that actually do make you happy.”

Q. “Each one of us is like that butterfly (the Butterfly Effect). And each tiny move toward a more positive mindset can send ripples of positivity through our organizations, our families, and our communities.”

THE SEVEN PRINCIPLES (cited in the book)

1. The Happiness Advantage – retrain our brains to capitalize on positivity and improve productivity and performance.

2. The Fulcrum and the Lever – adjust our mindset (fulcrum) to give us the power (lever) to be more fulfilled and satisfied.

3. The Tetris Effect – spot patterns of possibility to see and seize opportunities wherever we look.

4. Falling Up – finding the mental path that leads up and out of failure and teaches us how to be happier and more successful from it.

5. The Zorro Circle – regain emotional control when overwhelmed by challenges by focusing on small manageable goals and gradually expanding our circle.

6. The 20-Second Rule – by making small energy adjustments we can reroute the path of least resistance and replace bad habits with good ones.

7. Social Investment – avoid retreating within ourselves during tough times and invest more in building our social support network to propel ourselves forward.

L. Oh! V. E.

You’ve got to give a little

take a little

and let your poor heart break a little

that’s the story of

that’s the glory of

love

 

you’ve got to laugh a little

cry a little

until the clouds roll by a little

that’s the story of

that’s the glory of

love

 

you’ve got to win a little

lose a little

yes and always have the blues a little

thats the story of

thats the glory of

love

 

(the song for the opening scene in Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner).. LOVE this movie. LOVE how it’s applicable for the modern day – accepting each other, having compassion, being open, appreciating how people of different races and backgrounds can love each other. and can marry. and that was a time of complete discrimination, racism and segregation. sort of makes me think of all the opposition towards  gay-marriage now. and thank god that the closed people of the prior generations are being open.

when i was younger, i found the biggest issues in society accepting people’s love for each other to be

1. different religions

2. different socioeconomic backgrounds

3. same-sex

(race never ever came into my head)

but love is love. and whenever i am reminded of Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner, i remember the power of love in a world that’s based on so many archaic rules of different groups with different views…. views and rules that are so rigid, so harsh. and this movie, even though it’s so old, reminds me what it’s like to have zero prejudice and zero judgments.. and how our younger generation has to teach the older generation to discard the old ways of prejudice and the shattering of boundaries. these boundaries comprise of the stuff that divides us from others.. i.e. the stuff that makes us use the words “us and them.” .. there is only an “us.” the funny thing is, they taught us to be open, but when it comes to the actual practice and living of these open ways, they forget that they wanted us to be this loving to all people in the first place.

anyway, i’m going to go. the movie is on and it’s so beautiful that after these smiles i might just cry.

The Seven Realities

1. The only Real Existence is that of the One and only GOD who is the Self in every (finite) self.

2. The only Real Love is the love for this Infinity (GOD), which arouses an intense longing to see, know and become one with its Truth (GOD).

3. The only Real Sacrifice is that in which, in pursuance of this love, all things, body, mind , position , welfare , and even life itself, are sacrificed.

4. The only Real Renunciation is that which abandons, even in the midst of worldly duties, all selfish thoughts and desires.

5. The only Real Knowledge is the knowledge is that GOD is the inner dweller in good people and so-called bad, in saints and in so-called sinner. This knowledge requires you to help all equally as circumstances demand, without expectation of reward and, when compelled to take part in a dispute, to act without the slightest trace of enmity or hatred; to try to make others happy with brotherly or sisterly feelings for each one; to harm no one in though, word or deed, not even those who harm you.

6. The only Real Control is the discipline of the senses from indulgence in low desires, which alone ensures absolute purity of character.

7. The only Real Surrender is that in which poise is undisturbed by any adverse circumstances and the individual, amidst every kind of hardship, is resigned with perfect calm to the Will of God.

~Meher Baba

 

 

The Issue: Worrying.

The last few lines of You Worry Too Much by Rumi

Oh soul,
you worry too much.
You have seen your own strength.
You have seen your own beauty.
You have seen your golden wings.
Of anything less,
why do you worry?
You are in truth
the soul, of the soul, of the soul.
You are the security,
the shelter of the spirit of Lovers.
Oh the sultan of sultans,
of any other king,
why do you worry?
Be silent, like a fish,
and go into that pleasant sea.
You are in deep waters now,
of life’s blazing fire.
Why do you worry?

Rumi Quote:

“I want to sing like the birds sing, not worrying about who hears or what they think.”

Rumi on Worrying:

Be empty of worrying.
Think of who created thought!

Why do you stay in prison
when the door is so wide open?

Move outside the tangle of fear-thinking.
Live in silence.

Flow down and down in always
widening rings of being.

First few lines of Rumi Poem, Let Go of Your Worries:

Let go of your worries
and be completely clear-hearted,
like the face of a mirror
that contains no images.

The Return of the Jedi

or in this case:

THE RETURN OF THE MUSLIM

I am in a new town with new people so i promised my mum that in this new place i would make the effort to pray in congregration every Friday afternoon with my ummah (people of islamic faith).

I cannot say whether I liked or disliked the Friday prayers. What I liked was being around other people, praying to god, and praying for ourselves, side by side in our proximity, seeking comfort or solace or worship or love with the divine.

The part that was interesting was the khutbah (the little sermon before prayers begin). The imam was speaking as if no one would remember the things he was saying and so he was admonishing us. And then he said that people who have money shouldn’t spend their money on holidays like Disneyland but instead go to Hajj. Come on – i think we can do both. And he told every one that we’re lucky to be Muslim and that we should profess and promote our faith. (???) And he said that he wants us to read the Quran, even just one page, even half a page, but he doubts anyone would – maybe 1% of the people there. And I’m thinking to myself, “this is not doing it for me, pal. these admonishments and judgments are meant to be nourishing me spiritually? really?”

And than he says something that does resonate with me because it reminds me of the Muslim I was before I started my spiritual path in earnest. He says that there is only god, only god, only god, we only go to god for guidance. We do not seek intercession or direct guidance from, for example: angels, we do not have stones (for me I’m thinking – healing crystals), we don’t go to other means to receive divine guidance. And I remembered that’s what i learned as a child and what i know within me to be true. But you know something, god (the source of all) doesn’t always give you obvious answers.

Sometimes you have to delve into the world of energy and spiritual source for yourself rather than primally calling on god. You’re human, you’re having a spiritual experience on earth, of course you’re curious and want to see what this world is about. But Islam tells you to have blind faith — don’t go poking about, just believe. But proofs are great – I like finding the proofs – it only strengthens faith. It reassures you.

And that is what I remember about Islam. No matter how jaded this imam was with his congregation, he is just another person reminding us of words in the Qu’ran. He’s a human being. How is an old religious Arabic man living in Michigan going to truly teach me anything about myself and my divine self, when all he’s telling me is.. “don’t consult anything else. Read the Qu’ran. Don’t get distracted by stones and angels. (or ascended masters, or astrology, or magic, or tarot, or angels, or fairies, or other philosophies, or psychics and soothsayers). Have strong faith. Believe. Believe. Believe. You just need god. That’s it. That’s enough.”

He didn’t precisely say that but what I wrote is apt for me. So I always wondered whether I was truly muslim because I honestly don’t like to ever put rules and restrictions on the divine – because it’s this incalculable infinity to me… how can we ever put faith in a box? How can a religion ever contain all that we believe, feel and know? Even if i was of all the religions, it would not be enough.

But if that’s all there is… if it’s just pure belief… then count me in (just don’t expect that I give up my loving of all other ways of worship too). 

THE ISLAMIC CREED (according to what my experience and life has taught me)

So, if I may continue, as there IS only god, then everything is god, then all ways and paths are to god or within god, and then nothing that we do is not god. Everything that we are is god.

The Mantra of Islam (also known as The Declaration of Faith):

part 1) la illaha illa’ allah – there is no god but god (there is nothing but god)

part 2) muhammad ur rasoolullah – and Mohammed is god’s messenger 

 

The Five Pillars of Islam that make a muslim a muslim:

1. The declaration of faith (as above)

2. Praying (and as most people know, it’s 5 times a day)

3. Giving charity (i believe you’re meant to give 2.5% of your earnings per year)

4. Fasting (once a year, in the lunar month of Ramadan – we fast. many reasons why it’s good for us).

5. Pilgrimage  (to Hajj – at least once in your lifetime)

Seven Steps to Happiness & notes from yesterday

Seven Steps to Happiness by Yogi Bhajan

Commitment will give you character

Character will give you dignity

Dignity will give you divinity (when you have no duality)

Divinity will give you grace

Grace will give you the power to sacrifice

Power to sacrifice will give you

HAPPINESS

 

Five Sutras of The Aquarian Age

1. Recognize that the other person is you.

2. There is a way through every block.

3. When the time is on you, start, and the pressure will be off.

4. Understand through compassion or you will misunderstand the times.

5. Vibrate the Cosmos, Cosmos shall clear the path.

 

Jaap Sahib: Last Four Lines with translation

Chattar Chakkar Vartee, Chattar Chakkar Bhugatay

Suyambhav Subhang, Sarab Daa Sarab Jugatay

Dukaalang Pranaasee, Dayaalang Saroopay

Sadaa Ang Sangay, Abhangan Bibhootay

Thou art pervading in all the four quarters of the universe,

Thou art the enjoyer in all the fourt quarters of the universe.

Thou art self-illumined annd united with all.

Destroyer of bad times, embodiment of mercy.

Thou art ever within us.

Thou art the everlasting giver of undestroyable power.

loving and outgrowing

You’ve outgrown me. I’ve outgrown you. We’ve outgrown each other.

It is clear that we go through different phases and we meet more and different and new people, but I hold on to the ones who’ve meant something to me. I don’t discard them. I still try to give them time. They still remain important to me because they’re a part of who I am now, I am who I am because in some way they left a mark on me. And where I understand that I will come across many different types of people – I must also accept that I will come across people who are not like me – these people will discard people along the way – or they will care less about holding on to the friendship. It’s different with family – we always make time for them but there are also those people who we assume as family. and whereas I indeed hold on to family.. I can’t control the other person.. if they want to move on, let them move on. And if I want to hold on to a person like that then I must know who I’m dealing with. The real question is – do we want to hold on to emotionally unavailable people? Well in my case, if I’ve loved you once, I’ll love you forever. And I can’t be hurt by the fact that a person doesn’t want me in their life as much as I want them in mine. There is no time to be hurt – only time to acknowledge that you are hurt, and then you heal yourself. And you hold that person in your heart… and you keep on living.

But I will never be the person who outgrows someone I love. I’ll always want them and love them. (this can be perceived as weakness in the short term, but since when is the capacity to love and keep on loving ever going to be a weakness in the grand scheme?)

answer

Yesterday’s post was somewhat negative. It’s almost like i’ve had a full turnaround in 1 day. I think i’m closer to the answer.  The answer quite possibly is: WORK.  I think one’s got to derive their satisfaction from action, from purpose, from…. work. You have to do something that goes in line with your purpose and moves you towards your purpose.. or is your purpose. After all, we can’t love everything all the time, we can’t see the good in all things all the time. It’s just not possible. But if we can live our lives with a goal in mind, working towards it, and letting it be our work… then it’s likely we fall less into that existential abyss. And if we do fall, we can prop ourselves up – with our work. And when core things are in alignment then other things around it tend to align too.

Whining like Byron (followed by a more positive than usual Byron)

I don’t get why i can’t be happy any more. I’m doing things that should be making happy. I’m learning and studying something that i love. i’m going after something that previously eluded. i’m standing my ground and going for things. but something is missing. i still can’t get over the sadness. was i just a perpetually sad person with a smiling face? i think i was. when i think of myself as a child, i used to worry about everything. i’d feel joy and love but underneath all that was the dark reality that everything is transient, nothing lasts and when we taste something good – it inevitably ends. what is the answer for this sadness? i thought it was love then i thought it was god then it was friendship, but i don’t know what the answer is. i can believe that things can get better. but sometimes i just feel like i’m in plato’s allegorical cave — how can i know things are going to get better? i don’t even know anything. i don’t even know anything!!! i’m limited by human-ness.

i hate being such a downer. but it happens sometimes.

Here’s some Byron:

1.

Though the day of my destiny’s over,

And the star of my fate hath declined,

Thy soft heart refused to discover

The faults which so many could find;

Though thy soul with my grief was acquainted, 5

It shrunk not to share it with me,

And the love which my spirit hath painted

It never hath found but in thee.

2.

Then when nature around me is smiling,

The last smile which answers to mine, 10

I do not believe it beguiling,

Because it reminds me of thine;

And when winds are at war with the ocean,

As the breasts I believed in with me,

If their billows excite an emotion, 15

It is that they bear me from thee.

3.

Though the rock of my last hope is shivered,

And its fragments are sunk in the wave,

Though I feel that my soul is delivered

To pain – it shall not be its slave. 20

There is many a pang to pursue me –

They may crush, but they shall not contemn;

They may torture, but shall not subdue me –

’Tis of thee that I think, not of them.

4.

Though human, thou didst not deceive me; 25

Though woman, thou didst not forsake;

Though loved, thou forborest to grieve me;

Though slandered, thou never couldst shake;

Though trusted, thou didst not betray me;

Though parted, it was not to fly; 30

Though watchful, ’twas not to defame me,

Nor, mute, that the world might belie.

5.

Yet I blame not the world, nor condemn it,

14

Nor the war of the many with one –

If my soul was not fitted to prize it 35

’Twas folly not sooner to shun:

And if dearly that error hath cost me,

And more than I once could foresee,

I have found that, whatever it lost me,

It could not deprive me of thee. 40

6.

From the wreck of the past, which hath perished,

Thus much I at least my recall,

It hath taught me that what I most cherished

Deserved to be dearest of all:

In the desert a fountain is springing, 45

In the wide waste there still is a tree,

And a bird in the solitude singing,25

Which speaks to my spirit of thee.

The trick is…

Not minding that it hurts.

The trick, William Potter, is not minding that it hurts.

[Lawrence has just extinguished a match between his thumb and forefinger. William Potter surreptitiously attempts the same]

William Potter: Ooh! It damn well ‘urts!
T.E. Lawrence: Certainly it hurts.
Officer: What’s the trick then?
T.E. Lawrence: The trick, William Potter, is not minding that it hurts.